B1G Football Media Days Session 3: Elvis, The Art of War, P.J.’s Screaming & the New Guys Nebraska Huskers Matt Rhule

The last day of B1G Football Media Days began with the first speaker, Oregon’s Dan Lanning, rolling out three or four minutes late, sort of like getting a delay of game on the first play after the opening kickoff.

If we’re honest, however, it might not be a bad strategy. Jim Harbaugh pulled that late shit for his podium interview session last year and parlayed it into a national title. That being said, the opposition might want to keep their eyes peeled for a Connor Stalions-type dude running around with a magic notebook in case Lanning wants to all the way with copying the Wolverines championship formula.

By 2:00pm, the stadium crew was starting to tear everything down where they could even though there were officially three hours left to go. Yesterday, I mulled the fact that Matt Rhule finished up his main podium speech around 12:45, then had 30 minutes before he had to turn around and do his 45 minute individual podium session.

He had the better deal.

In contrast, Lanning led off the main stage at 11:30 11:35, but his interview session didn’t commence until 4:15, the very last of the day. I’m sure he had some interviews during the day to keep him busy, but I’d bet you he wasn’t a second late for that one.

While the Lucas Oil Stadium field wasn’t empty – there were a good number of us typing away in the mid-afternoon – it was certainly emptier as many starting heading to catch afternoon flights as soon as they scarfed down one last free meal on the B1G.

Burger day, baby.

So while the final day petered off as proceedings proceeded, it wasn’t without its entertainment. Here were some of the highlights:

I SWEAR THESE WEST COAST BOYS THINK WE DON’T KNOW ANY GEOGRAPHY OUTSIDE OF HAPPY VALLEY TO LINCOLN. AND P.J. – FOR GOD’S SAKE CALM DOWN. YOU HAVE A MICROPHONE.

• Lanning started off by giving a shout-out to Craig Bohl for his work as the executive director of the American Football Coaches Association (AFCA). I did not know the Huskers’ former defensive coordinator had taken that on – congratulations, sir!
• Ducks opponents watch out – Lanning read Sun Tzu’s Art of Wear this summer. He’s gonna keep his enemies closer and move like water, y’all.
• Lanning wanted to make sure we know everything about Oregon is different. Examples cited were the different uniform combos and the giant duck floatie. Says they’re going to try and throw that in a river at every road stop in the B1G. I’ll only say gun ownership in Big 10 country may be higher and a little more free-wheeling than Eugene – and Quackers, or whatever his name is, may be considered a solid target to drunk and armed midwestern fans.
• P.J. Fleck starred in his own version of Extremely Loud and Way Too Damned Close. He was at once very proud of himself, pissed at all of us and…screaming. Honestly, we were wondering if he’d lost his damned mind.
• Fleck: “It’s okay to love Minnesota! It’s okay to love where you’re at!” (Assume everything he says is in boldface.) Now rumors are far from 100% accurate, but they had it last year he was upset at not being offered the Nebraska job and this offseason year chasing the UCLA job. So let’s just say it’s okay to love Minnesota but keep your options open.
• He was also talking yelling about “cultural sustainability” and “transactional pieces”? It’s a maybe on that second one; by then, I was losing focus.
• Yo, keep an eye out for NCAA 25 hacks! Peej said he’s got a lineman or something he moved to TE and the game bumped that guy’s rating to a 99!
• Maryland HC Mike Locksley came out no tie on, said he saw guys leaving them off at SEC Media Days, so eff it. Okay, not his exact words, but still a guy to whom I can relate!
• Talking about excuses why Maryland can’t win big, he used a quote I will be adopting for personal use – “My give a crap gauge is on E.” Yes, it is.
• A former Nick Saban assistant, he said the former Alabama coach still impacts his life and they very much stay in touch.
• He finished off by rocking a “Thank yuh veruh much,” then leaving the stage. Solid Elvis game, I almost clapped.
• Jedd Fisch is the new Washington coach having left Arizona, where he was 16-21 to take the job. Sounds sketchy, but those three years were 1-11, 5-7, 10-3.
• Washington is replacing 22 starters following their CFP title game loss to Michigan about which he said, “We’re excited!!” According to Fisch, they return four players who started one game each. I don’t know if “excited” would be my first thought.
• I just kind of stayed away from Sherrone Moore. I feel bad for what I think is about to happen to him. Michigan lost most of their starters and leadership, Harbaugh’s best coaches followed him out and Moore’s teams may take the brunt of the fallout when the NCAA gets around to dropping the hammer for the cheating scandal.
• And he won’t have the last few years’ “advantages” at his disposal.
• Curt Cignetti is the new HC at Indiana coming over from James Madison where he went 52-9 and, while he did inherit a 1-AA/FCS team on a heater, he did roll them into D1/FBS and the Dukes didn’t lose a step.
• And like a certain other successful Group of 5 type coach we know, he rolled in hot to his first B1G Media Days. “The Big 10 is gonna have to adjust to us?” Hold my beer and watch this said Curt.
• He came out firing with nuggets about his teams usually being picked to win conferences, only picked next to last twice before and now this! (I’m pretty sure Indiana is picked dead last by a good margin, but as Boon said about Bluto, “Forget it, he’s rolling.)
• Cignetti went on to say Indiana isn’t a next to last place team (no, it’s definitely a last-place team – I kid! I kid!) and the margin of error between winning and losing in the Big 10 is very thin. And the two other times he was picked next-to-last, he took a 0 or 1 win team to 8 wins and the other time, he made the conference title game. Curt’s comin’ for your wives, too, y’all!!

A FINAL B1G FOOTBALL MEDIA DAYS DIARY FOR EVERYONE (And my final time typing that even title out!)

A FEW FINAL OBSERVATIONS FROM INDY

• The players try to hide it, but they’re thrilled to have their names along with likenesses in NCAA 25. Many want to see their ranking go up when EA makes mid-season adjustments.
• The celebrity value was down a little this year with the conference losing some superstars who arrived last year with record of high-end success. No Marvin Harrison Jr’s sporting $6 or $7k worth of suits and bling.
• The TV talent dress of choice for the guys seems to be the skinny suits with sneaks. On former athletes or gym rats, it rocks. On others…
• Full disclosure – my fashion sense has been described as ranging from “Do you own pants?” to “Is that a collar?? OMG!” to “Seriously? You know cargo shorts are out, right?”
• I can’t help but wonder if those Pac-12 teams are in for a little sticker shock much this season, much like Nebraska when they moved in. Michigan handled Washington last season, Washington beat Oregon twice, yet many think Oregon might roll through everyone next season.
• Can’t help but remember how we thought we were going to do the same, but we had built ourselves for a wide-open Big 12 and found things a little rough. Oregon and Southern Cal in particular might need some adjustments to the trench warfare coming their way.

Nebraska Cornhuskers

Oregon Ducks

Washington Huskies

Minnesota Golden Gophers

Maryland Terrapins

Indiana Hoosiers

Michigan Wolverines